This one is for me.

This journey has been so ongoing and I think that I have lost sight of the long haul of it.  I was so used to a seemingly endless drop, that I think my mind began to think it would be seamless, but no longer.   I'm back on track and again losing but I think that I have learned a valuable lesson from these weeks of not having a success of which to speak of.  There is no going back...

I will never be able to eat as I did, to not workout as I did, to be who I was.  That is hard to accept sometimes, because in the end and in many real ways, I am still me.  It is still me in my head and even though she has changed a bit physically, it is still me when I look in the mirror.  However, it is not me at my core.  It is not me fundamentally and it will never be the "old" me again, not if I want to be successful.  

This week I found myself deciding not to go anywhere and to stay home.  Weekends have been turning into an ordeal because I find it so much harder to stay on plan when I am not the one preparing meals.  So I had a choice to make.  It does not mean that I will never go out again, but I need to choose my battles wisely.  If I went out last week I do not need to do so this week.  It's ok to miss out on a few things.  I will survive, and I did survive and I saw a weight loss on the scale because of it.  So this one is for getting back on track, back in the race, and just plain back to the me who felt that I could do this.  The new me, the me I want to be.