Trying to work it out!

So yesterday I exhibited my usual inability to say no to food and said yes to this fruit tart that the chef next door to me sent a student with. Mmmmm.....it was all kinds of delicious.  That would not have been so bad if later that day I didn't decide to go out and celebrate my coworker's birthday.  Now in terms of alcohol consumption I was a good girl.  One glass of cabernet sauvignon.  However the fried wings were another matter entirely.  They were little half wings with a side of blue cheese dressing.  Of course the first serving I had 4 because I was still trying to be a good girl, but, by the second serving of 5 more I felt like crap.  I quickly upon finishing it had a glass of water and then called it a night.  I don't know that I have ever run away from hanging out but that's exactly what I did.  I recognized that my will power was not stronger than that tray of wings, so I cut out.

I'm both proud and annoyed at myself.  My fat ass could not take the heat of being near fatty, fried and delicious food, I felt like an alcoholic in the middle of a bar (Not a bad analogy since I was, in fact, in the middle of a bar). However, I was proud that I had the will power to get out at all, a few weeks ago I would have said "screw it, I'll start over tomorrow" and proceeded to devour those chickens like a fox in a hen house.

I came home, I worked out, had residual guilt and worked out again this morning.  Plus I'm anticipating I may be going out to have a few drinks tonight, and as I've said in previous posts that's a whole epic journey in itself.

State of mind? Strangely optimistic, exasperated with myself and proud.